User:Kingrussel

Hah, I wrote this like 3 years ago. Still funny in a weird ironic totally wrong, overly saturated memey way. Go past, embarrassing me.

The Entire Plot of Mabinogi.

[ 10:07:11 AM] Kingrussel says: You are born into the world in a new body, A Milletian. You're essentially a godbeing wherein, You can never die, and you constantly grow and gain power.

[ 10:07:19 AM] Kingrussel says: This was facilitated by two individuals

[ 10:07:55 AM] Kingrussel says: Morrighan, The first goddess, and Nao, Her deciple and Demi-god emmisary.

[ 10:08:21 AM] Kingrussel says: Morrighan pleads to you, to free her from the grasp of an Evil God known as Chicol.

[ 10:08:23 AM] Kingrussel says: You do it.

[ 10:08:33 AM] Kingrussel says: She says thnx go be a pally now k?

[ 10:08:41 AM] Kingrussel says: And then you do that.

[ 10:08:50 AM] Kingrussel says: You become a paladin, and fight for justice and shit.

[ 10:09:14 AM] Kingrussel says: You go ahead with justice and then you're urged to go stop the reincarnation of the 2nd Goddess; Macha.

[ 10:09:31 AM] Kingrussel says: And you go ahead and do that, defeating a stone replica of a scary ass old dragon

[ 10:09:37 AM] Kingrussel says: Who tells you that you're cool, but dangerous.

[ 10:09:54 AM] Kingrussel says: We find out about this weird ass new continent.

[ 10:10:04 AM] Kingrussel says: Elves and Giants are just chillin' on it, killing the shit out of eachother

[ 10:10:28 AM] Kingrussel says: Turns out this Deity called the Irinid, gave them a whole bunch of cool shit, but they fought over who got the most

[ 10:11:14 AM] Kingrussel says: So she fucked their shit up and pulled a switchy on their weathers (Elves are stuck in the desert and have shitty memory, the Giants are stuck in the snow and essentially have hyper steroidy thought process)

[ 10:11:27 AM] Kingrussel says: Cause they fuck'd up her gift and that ain't cool

[ 10:11:40 AM] Kingrussel says: She stuck some crazy dragons up top in this place called zardine

[ 10:11:42 AM] Kingrussel says: Cool whatever

[ 10:11:45 AM] Kingrussel says: Saves us from dieing

[ 10:11:47 AM] Kingrussel says: Which is cool

[ 10:11:52 AM] Kingrussel says: Dragons like to go on rampages >>

[ 10:11:55 AM] Kingrussel says: Whateves

[ 10:12:10 AM] Kingrussel says: Then we leave the contient, looks like our government needs us

[ 10:13:02 AM] Kingrussel says: Turns out this renegade group of cultist alchemists are trying to make a legendary weapon of a god from days long past. It's both demonic and holy in nature, and can be replicated through science, albiet dangerous and impossible to controll.

[ 10:13:20 AM] Kingrussel says: So they dumb it up, and actually do it, while working with the Evil god from the first part

[ 10:13:31 AM] Kingrussel says: But they only finish half of it before you say

[ 10:13:35 AM] Kingrussel says: "Hey, guys. No"

[ 10:14:07 AM] Kingrussel says: so you fuck their shit up, beat up the crazy weapon thing, and then they run the fuck away.

[ 10:16:37 AM] Kingrussel says: Next you get called again "Oh Shit dude...We're in even more shit now. Looks like there's weird ass stuff going on like prophesies and shit"

[ 10:16:47 AM] Kingrussel says: Then we find out about this goddess called Nemhain

[ 10:17:00 AM] Kingrussel says: She's like the embodyment of pure Light.

[ 10:17:31 AM] Kingrussel says: And it also turns out she was the Irinid

[ 10:17:38 AM] Kingrussel says: And she's still pissed

[ 10:18:00 AM] Kingrussel says: And even more so, cause along with Elves and Giants still throwing rocks and sticks at eachother, they're doing it in the holy, motherfucking, land.

[ 10:18:08 AM] Kingrussel says: Which she doesn't dig cause it's supposed to be paradise

[ 10:18:15 AM] Kingrussel says: And if people not worty of paradise enter

[ 10:18:19 AM] Kingrussel says: It ceases to be thus.

[ 10:19:12 AM] Kingrussel says: So yeah, Neamy has a shit fit, takes the Heart of Couricle (The thing that made everything cool over on the other world) and says 'FUCK ALL YALL I WILL END ALL OF THIS AND MAKE THIS PARADISE! PEACE BITCHES!"

[ 10:19:20 AM] Kingrussel says: And everyone kinda not fond of this

[ 10:19:49 AM] Kingrussel says: Also, of course, Chicol, the evil dude, has made a pact with her that he'll assist her in the purification if she allows his army into heavy

[ 10:19:55 AM] Kingrussel says: They both try and backstab eachother

[ 10:19:58 AM] Kingrussel says: Both fail miserably

[ 10:20:42 AM] Kingrussel says: You come in and say "Lol you guys are dumb. Also Neamhain, he killed your son or whatever, I'mma go save part of your world and and absorb his powers Kthnxbai"

[ 10:21:14 AM] Kingrussel says: Then you poof up there, thanks to the first Goddess who sits there wagging her finger and clucking her tongue

[ 10:21:23 AM] Kingrussel says: At her other god siblings or whatever

[ 10:21:53 AM] Kingrussel says: You absorb part of Nemhains power and become a demi god and you're all like "Hey guys, can I join ur club?" And the gods are like "Ugh noob get out of here"

[ 10:22:36 AM] Kingrussel says: Then you hear about this ancient race of snake people or whatever who were wiped out and cursed because of the gods being pissed at them for being weak so now they live as the undead.

[ 10:22:43 AM] Kingrussel says: Of course, they aren't very fond of this treatment.

[ 10:23:13 AM] Kingrussel says: The evil dude, having failed so hard lately is betrayed by his people and is left allyless for once.

[ 10:24:27 AM] Kingrussel says: The parthalonians, the snake folks, however don't side with either but see that you're studious and obviously very powerful, so they lend you their knowledge, but then you get stupid and look into it more and you see they want to harm your precious goddess Morrighan, so you stand up tot hem

[ 10:24:52 AM] Kingrussel says: Turns out they're essentially REALLY fucking aggressive atheists. As in; There is no god, or if there is I'LL FUCKING KILL IT

[ 10:25:41 AM] Kingrussel says: So you step in, and when you do, Evil dude is like: "Dude shit...I'mma god aren't I? Fuck someones gonna kill me soon I know it. How about this, you borrow these powers, and do your thing, I'll eventually come back that way. Please kick their asses kthnx Im dead bai"

[ 10:26:16 AM] Kingrussel says: He gets killed, you get his cool shadow powers, you stop the parthalonians once and for all

[ 10:27:47 AM] Kingrussel says: IN the process, you get this thing called Caliburn

[ 10:28:36 AM] Kingrussel says: Which is a direct form of all of the power in Erinn (The world) and thus are a host to like 4 gods powers.

[ 10:28:43 AM] Kingrussel says: You're a fucking machine by this point

[ 10:29:33 AM] Kingrussel says: Despite the fact you only did it to save Morrighan

[ 10:29:41 AM] Kingrussel says: She's of course gonna take the bitch route

[ 10:29:50 AM] Kingrussel says: "They're getting too strong..."

[ 10:30:04 AM] Kingrussel says: BIGGEST TWIST YET!: SHES THE GODDES OF MOTHER FUCKING REVENGE!

[ 10:31:53 AM] Kingrussel says: So you go about flailing the Caliburn around which is now a crazy ass spear/sword thing

[ 10:31:58 AM] Kingrussel says: Aka rape stick

[ 10:33:37 AM] Kingrussel says: Then all of a sudden: "Psst...Hey kid we're in trouble again, this group of rowdy alchemists are trying that spirit weapon thing again...Couja...maybe..fixit?"

[ 10:33:47 AM] Kingrussel says: You: "FIIIIINE!>:C"

[ 10:34:04 AM] Kingrussel says: So you stop them before they even try and when you do this, someone finally hears of it

[ 10:34:08 AM] Kingrussel says: This dude

[ 10:34:10 AM] Kingrussel says: His name is Nuadha

[ 10:34:12 AM] Kingrussel says: He's a god

[ 10:36:02 AM] Kingrussel says: In the past, he fought with the Parthanolians to defeat the rampaging dragons and some other stuff

[ 10:36:25 AM] Kingrussel says: He lost his arm first in a fight called 'The battle of Magh Trudeh'

[ 10:36:38 AM] Kingrussel says: And they of course, forced him away for his disfigurement.

[ 10:36:52 AM] Kingrussel says: He got a new fancy mythril arm and came back and despite the shit fromt he first time

[ 10:37:04 AM] Kingrussel says: He forgave them, but when they fought against a specifically vicious dragon

[ 10:37:15 AM] Kingrussel says: They ran like little pussies and left him to die (as much as a god can die)

[ 10:37:27 AM] Kingrussel says: He was finally re-awakend by the stupid alchemists

[ 10:37:34 AM] Kingrussel says: Who kept bringing back HIS WEAPON

[ 10:37:39 AM] Kingrussel says: (2nd biggest twist)

[ 10:46:28 AM] Kingrussel says: The gods are basically power hungry dicks who hate it when others get power.

[ 10:47:06 AM] Kingrussel says: But give their power to others because they can't do anything really to eachother cause they're heled in check by their parent gods

[ 10:47:09 AM] Kingrussel says: held*

[ 10:47:39 AM] Kingrussel says: So you go ahead and meet with this Nuadha guy

[ 10:47:44 AM] Kingrussel says: And he's all like

[ 10:48:20 AM] Kingrussel says: "HEY BROOOO! You did a sweet as move killin' my weapon. Saved me the trouble. And you're mortal and shit. That's a cool move bro, way gnarly. Hey, you wanna be a god? I could totally hook you up"

[ 10:48:28 AM] Kingrussel says: And you're like "WOAH WHAT A BRO MOVE! SURE DUDE!"

[ 10:48:39 AM] Kingrussel says: SO you go ahead and do whatever he says cause you're A FUCKING RETARD

[ 10:48:50 AM] Kingrussel says: Then

[ 10:48:55 AM] Kingrussel says: BIG FUCKING SUPRISE!

[ 10:49:12 AM] Kingrussel says: He only wanted you to ascended so he had the backing power to become the strongest father god

[ 10:49:23 AM] Kingrussel says: And ignore the rules and take over and wipe out humans for fucking him over.

[ 10:49:29 AM] Kingrussel says: You of course ain't' havin' that

[ 10:49:36 AM] Kingrussel says: So you seal him in a remote chamber in heaven

[ 10:49:42 AM] Kingrussel says: And go fix the shit he screwed up

[ 10:50:28 AM] Kingrussel says: You of course; are now hated by Morrighan for your 'Pride and greed"

[ 10:50:44 AM] Kingrussel says: Oh, and Chichol

[ 10:51:00 AM] Kingrussel says: He's not dead anymore, because you opened the door for him to resurect by sealing up Nuadha

[ 10:51:22 AM] Kingrussel says: So he's like "Oh hey, did'ja miss me? ;3"

[ 10:51:27 AM] Kingrussel says: Then you ignore the gods for a while

[ 10:51:40 AM] Kingrussel says: And you go off to take part in Shakespeare apparently

[ 10:51:49 AM] Kingrussel says: You find out that a king has died recently

[ 10:51:52 AM] Kingrussel says: You go research it

[ 10:52:05 AM] Kingrussel says: And it turns out, it was the written work of Shakespeare coming to life

[ 10:52:11 AM] Kingrussel says: You go to this world known as Avon

[ 10:52:31 AM] Kingrussel says: It's split bilinarly down the center.

[ 10:53:04 AM] Kingrussel says: When you enter, you meet with a Demigod who gives you a script and asks that you help him finish it because he loves the original writers work

[ 10:53:10 AM] Kingrussel says: Script: Hamlet

[ 10:53:30 AM] Kingrussel says: You take part in the story of hamlet, and as you do you find out the story of the In Game Shakespear

[ 10:53:43 AM] Kingrussel says: Turns out he was given powers from the gods to be a seer and such

[ 10:54:14 AM] Kingrussel says: So he prophesises that the town he lives in (Avon) will be hit by a devistating plauge sent on by the gods

[ 10:54:37 AM] Kingrussel says: So he tries to warn every one

[ 10:55:07 AM] Kingrussel says: Of course, the gods don't like this because he wasn't supposed to use his powers to interfere with the gods work.

[ 10:55:20 AM] Kingrussel says: He of course, gives into human stubbonrness, and tries anyway

[ 10:55:27 AM] Kingrussel says: No one gives a fuck and calls him a loon

[ 10:55:34 AM] Kingrussel says: Then he ushers all the children out

[ 10:55:52 AM] Kingrussel says: Also he takes the rats that were carrying said plage

[ 10:55:54 AM] Kingrussel says: plauge*

[ 10:55:56 AM] Kingrussel says: whatever >>

[ 10:56:00 AM] Kingrussel says: And lures them into a river

[ 10:56:02 AM] Kingrussel says: To die

[ 10:56:08 AM] Kingrussel says: IRISH-Y!

[ 10:56:17 AM] Kingrussel says: So he does that, the children have left for saftey

[ 10:56:22 AM] Kingrussel says: And the people there all die out

[ 10:56:26 AM] Kingrussel says: Guess who those people are?

[ 10:56:29 AM] Kingrussel says: PARTHALONIANS!

[ 10:56:34 AM] Kingrussel says: The gods knew what they'd do

[ 10:56:42 AM] Kingrussel says: He didn't cause he didn't see THAT far ahead

[ 10:56:47 AM] Kingrussel says: And he just wanted to save the people

[ 10:56:50 AM] Kingrussel says: but for what he did

[ 10:56:54 AM] Kingrussel says: They locked him up in Avon

[ 10:57:02 AM] Kingrussel says: And sent it into a purgatory dimension

[ 10:57:14 AM] Kingrussel says: But a bro-dacious god named Marlowe allows him to escape

[ 10:57:31 AM] Kingrussel says: And when he does; Avon takes the shape of his mind and soul

[ 10:58:06 AM] Kingrussel says: He tells the player that it's important to ignore the gods rule about 'light being right' all of the time

[ 10:58:12 AM] Kingrussel says: And to shape their own destiny.

[ 10:58:31 AM] Kingrussel says: You then return to Avon and finish the play

[ 10:58:42 AM] Kingrussel says: Which gives Shakespear some of his original power back

[ 10:58:47 AM] Kingrussel says: But also; pisses off the gods

[ 10:58:55 AM] Kingrussel says: AND GUESS WHO FINALLY HAD ENOUGH!!

[ 10:59:00 AM] Kingrussel says: Morrighan pops in

[ 10:59:13 AM] Kingrussel says: Says 'ur dumb, meet the grim raper. n-joy'

[ 10:59:28 AM] Kingrussel says: So you fight the grim reaper who is one of the jail keepers of Avon

[ 10:59:57 AM] Kingrussel says: Shakeystick comes in and says "Oh I got new powers, lemme weaken him so you stand a chance Kbai~~"

[ 10:59:59 AM] Kingrussel says: So you do

[ 11:00:10 AM] Kingrussel says: You kill the reaper

[ 11:00:15 AM] Kingrussel says: Smack the shit out of cowbell

[ 11:00:19 AM] Kingrussel says: And that's as far ast he story is

[ 11:00:28 AM] Kingrussel says: So basically Morrighan created you and now feels stupid